You’re sitting in a dank dungeon cell with your wrists bound when all of a sudden, a Dunmer voice fills the room, dripping with sarcasm: “Hey, you hear that? The guards are coming now…for you!” Instant nostalgia for any Elder Scrolls fan who played Oblivion. Valen Dreth has once again exploded on Twitter, and the whole internet just cannot keep up with this throwback.
For the uninitiated-first of all, how dare you not have played Oblivion?-Valen Dreth was the sassy dark elf prisoner who taunted you during the iconic opening sequence of the game. Defiantly locked across the cell from yours in the Imperial City dungeons, this guy threw shade as you waited for your execution. Now, 17 years later, only Bethesda could casually slip his voice line out like it was no biggie? Oh, the audacity! The disrespect! We ARE NOT emotionally prepared.
The tweet itself is relatively simple-an image of a cold prison corridor with Valen’s most famous saying-but the flashbacks were terrible. The Oblivion fans immediately showered the replies with memes, accounts of their own experiences from their first playthroughs, and even that one guy who always tries to pick the lock instead of just firmly following the scripted exit. The usual.
Valen Dreth is remembered for more than just punchlines: there’s the performance. Wes Johnson, the smart assassin-like voice, was just the right brand of smugness and contempt; just about made you want to glower at your screen. Fast-forward: and you actually get to gloat back and choke him later on in the game. Sweet release.
That random tweet has triggered heated PD-discussions on whether Oblivion’s intro is better than Skyrim’s (It is, fight me), which NPCs boast the best voice acting (Sheogorath exists; there is no contest), and if Bethesda is truly teasing us about something. Let’s be real here: fans are ravenous for any news on Elder Scrolls 6, so the mere crumbs of halfway content get picked apart in search of confirmation, only to lead nowhere. Just what could this be hinting at? A prison breakout phase in the new game? Or just Bethesda being Bethesda? No one really knows!
Meanwhile, speedrunners have gathered to relive war flashbacks, hell-endorsed openers attempted hundreds of times. It’s all about timing: skip dialogue and find the proper angle to wall clip; hearing Valen Dreth’s voice now occupies their nightmares rent-free. And, of course, again, we equally consciously inflict that trauma onto ourselves.
It is crazy. How one throwaway NPC evolved into such a huge cultural icon. The guy probably has less than five minutes of proper screen time, but ask any Oblivion-loving crowd to name some characters, and this guy is a strong contender for the top five. That is the magic of Bethesda world-building-Even random prisoners feel real because they scream personality from every pixel.
So, Bethesda went and dropped this multi-barrel nostalgia bomb of theirs, and now we are all crammed back into our parents’ basements eating dry Hot Pockets while Nostalgiating about the first-time run through Cyrodiil. Much obliged for that. Excuse me as I go back and cry my heart out in Oblivion for the 37th time while reminiscing about how games just do not have that same feel anymore.
And somebody better check on the modding community because there is definitely a “Play as Valen Dreth” mod on the stove right now. Never change, Elder Scrolls fandom. Never change.
